Wednesday, 3 March 2010

Year One

Hey, this blog still exists?

It's been a long time, kiddies.  And I honestly haven't seen a horrible movie in quite a long time.  I guess because we have so many films available on Netflix to watch instantly that I tend to stay away from the ones that I know are gonna be terrible.

Then a friend whispers tales of guilty chuckles into your ear, and against your better judgment you find yourself watching something like Year One.  And it is so awful, so mind-numbingly terrible that you can't even bring yourself to turn it off.  You just sit there, mouth agape, drinking in every last putrid drop.  As if a spell had been cast.  And nothing will ever be the same again.

What happened to Jack Black?  I remember he used to be funny, but when I try to recall it all I can really come up with is High Fidelity.  Has he ever been funny outside of that film?  And that was what...10 years ago?  That's a long time to be a major comedic film star AND be incredibly unfunny.  Well, at least this film had Michael Cera around, and he showed a much wider range of acting than in anything he has ever done previously.  Just kidding...he played the same character he always plays.  Just in a caveman outfit and a wig.

Honestly, the only reason I kept on watching this steaming turd of a film was the incredible number of supporting roles and cameos by folks whose work I usually enjoy.  David Cross, Paul Rudd, Olivia Wilde (yum), Oliver Platt, Bill Hader, Hank Azaria, etc...  I guess they all signed up because it was a Judd Apatow production and because director Harold Ramis once made Caddyshack.  That's it.  That's the only reason I can come up with.

Because this is clearly a film that should never have been made.  It's an embarrassment to everyone involved including the viewer.  It's like an unfunny History of the World: Part I.  Or an unholy union between the Dudley Moore flop Wholly Moses! and the Ringo Starr flop Caveman.  The bastard maniac child of two historic flops from the early 1980's, if you will. 

Did I just show my age there?  Crap.


Slyde said...

yes, i DID sit through this this week.

i have to agree, that it did indeed blow, but i just LOVE michael cera. i dont know what it is about him, but i find him EXTREMELY funny.

and the scene where jack black tasted the poop made me chuckle (at least michael cera's line).

that was it tho.

Bruce said...

Any film that purports to be comedic about the era B.C. has to be avoided. The last good one I saw was "A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum"...and at least had good music.

B.E. Earl said...

Slyde - Maybe you just like he fact that he is so sensitive and feminine. You want to protect him. Right?

Bruce - That was a good one, although I think Mel Brooks did it pretty well in A History of the World too. The pre-French Revolution stuff, of course.

jeremy said...

This was my favorite film of last year. I can't believe it was overlooked from the Academy. Oh least my District 9 is getting is deserved propers.

sybil law said...

I hate when there's a bunch of stars in movies - it's like asking for a shit bomb.

Mrs. Holly Hall said...

ok, I think the the thing that bugs me about Jack Black is well, he stole his name from the lead singer of the Pixies. He is fat and scruffy and proud of it.

When I was watching him promote King Kong on the Today show he looked at himself in the monitor and said, 'jeez should have whiped off the crusties from my face'. like it's OK FOR A GROWN MAN NOT TO FUCKING SHOWER BEFORE GOING ON NATIONAL TV.

and the fat and gruffy stuff. the 'i don't care cause being big and gruffy' is like being 'john bulishi esque' cause he was all rebel and fat and scruffy. THAT SHIT IS WEAK.

cause Bulishi was a drug addict. but he was funny. and he was cool. The real Pixie Jack Black was scruffy, but again, TALENTED AND COOL. unlike this dude.

Also the one thing that bugs me about Jack Black is when he played the panda in that kung fu panda.

I have to sit through that and hear his weak ass voice over every damn time.

I mean, he makes a million CAHONES. Has a babe for a wife. Has a kid. And yet there he is. A man child, not showering nor paying homage to his craft. He just goofs around monkey.

I've never heard of this movie, but thank you for warning me about it. Although you could have just said, "Jack Black stars in this one". which means the same thing as "It's a steaming turd of a film."


obviously i had some pent up stuff there. I feel better now ;)

Mrs. Hall out!

B.E. Earl said...

Holly, Holly, Holly - tsk, tsk, tsk. First off. "Jack" Black is his real name. Well, he was born Thomas Jacob Black, but he's been calling himself Jack since he was a kid, and at least since he started acting in 1991.

Secondly, the lead singer of The Pixies is FRANK Black, or Black Francis, if you prefer. He didn't start calling himself Frank Black until The Pixies broke up and he started his solo career in 1993. And his real name is Charles Michael Kittridge Thompson IV.

So Jack Black has been Jack Black for a lot longer than Frank Black has been Frank Black, okay?

It doesn't excuse him for being unfunny though. Not at all.

Mrs. Holly Hall said...

Now, I don't know where you got your "facts" (out thin air maybe?) But you are wrong buddy!!!

Cause I came to my conclusions all by myself so that makes me still right and standing by all I said there.

Well, everything besides the name change that Jack Black went through. But I FIRST CAME TO KNOW HIM as the solo artist. So. yay no, my bad.


B.E. Earl said...

Holly - OK...just please stop calling him Jack. It's Frank. The actor...Jack. The musician...Frank. Okay? ;)

Cocaine Princess said...

I saw Year Old and thought it was absolutely hilarious. I loved the little jokes and I like Michael Cera's acting: He's always so calm and down to earth in any situation he's in.